Healing Stories “If you don’t do this you will lose your job”
Have you ever worked for a manager or a boss that came down on you one day and told you that if you didn’t master a certain part of the business you worked at you may not be employed there anymore?
Sometimes it’s new technology. Maybe a manager will come in the office and say everyone is going to be trained on a certain computer system, and if you’re insecure about computers, it might put the fear of God in you right now!
Or maybe public speaking… Which many people fear greater than the fear of dying. There are many people that when they’re told they have to do a presentation for the new position they freeze up. They become afraid. Anxiety rises. But if they want to keep their job how are they going to work through this anxiety?
Number one best-selling author, counselor, life coach and radio host David Essel, for the past 27 years has helped people to overcome their greatest fears in life… And allow them to feel the incredible increase of self-esteem and confidence once they master that area they’re afraid of.
Below, David shares the story of a female client he was working with, who was told by her boss one day that if she didn’t master the art of speaking in front of small groups of people he was going to have to let her go.
But he did throw her a bone. He said to her, however if you do master the art of presenting in front of people, I will guarantee you a raise in the very near future.
Let’s hear David’s side of the story.
“20 years ago I got a frantic call from a woman who was about to lose her job. She was petrified because her boss had just told her that, in her marketing position, one of the new responsibilities was going to be speaking in front of small groups of people.
This included tradeshows, where she would be behind the table promoting their products, and answering questions to people who came up interested in the potential of buying what she had to sell.
She told me she had never been more fearful in her whole life. That ever since she was a little kid she was shy. She loved marketing but did not enjoy sales. And now her boss was telling her that she had to not only understand marketing, but she had to become a sales person within the organization as well.
But she did tell me she had an option. She could take a demotion in the company, A huge decrease in her pay if she didn’t want to go and learn how to present publicly. Of course to her this wasn’t an option, but learning how to speak in public was nothing that she was excited about.
So I introduced her to my course on public speaking and public communication. I told her that if she showed up every week for our work together, and did the homework that I gave her, within a short 10 weeks the program would be over and she would be looking at a raise. She looked at me and said “you are by far the most positive person I have ever met because you don’t even know me and you think that you can turn me into a public speaker. Good luck!”
We had a good laugh together and then we got right to work. We examined her belief systems. We went back into her childhood and easily found the time she was embarrassed in her third-grade class when she stumbled over a reading assignment. From that day forward she never wanted to speak in front of people again.
We also found out through our work by going back into her childhood, that her father was the same way. He was an accountant, and he never wanted to be in front of people speaking. He would do everything in his power to avoid social events, and business events where people expected him to talk about his role as the accountant of this large company.
So not only did she have a negative experience in third grade but she also had a role model that shared her fear of speaking in public.
I assured her that this was natural. That most people came to me to learn how to be a better communicator came from bad experiences in the past.
I told her I’ve walked this path 1000 times and I guaranteed her that we could see great success fairly quickly.
She was shocked at the end of the first session, when I gave her a small assignment to speak in my office, with my back turned towards her. She thought that was weird, but within five minutes she was doing this mini 60 second presentation in a very commanding voice and with more confidence than I thought she would have at the end of one session. The homework was a little tougher. She had to go home and write a 60 second speech about her company and rehearse it six times a day over the next six days until I saw her again.
Every week I worked with her we went into a new area of self-confidence and self-esteem. I taught her how to write short outlines, sort of like a little scripts, so that she had something to fall back to when she was speaking about her company.
I talked her about the importance of using props, small articles of information that she could hold up as she was speaking, to divert some of the attention from her so that she felt more comfortable in front of small groups.
We helped her destroy all limiting beliefs. Along with the props, I continue to help her work on outlines that would make her presentation so much easier to remember.
Like the four most important tips when it came to selling her products. Or the six most important keys that separated her products from all the other companies on the market that sold the same thing.
By week eight she was having a blast! I remember specifically on that day her looking at me after doing a seven minute presentation that was exceptional, she looked and said “David Essel I have no idea how you did this. You’re a miracle worker. I actually have had fun in this course and I can’t wait to show my boss everything I’ve learned.”
And it gets even better from here! At the end of the course she went into her bosses office and said she was ready to do the presentation. He shut the door and said have at it.
For the next 10 minutes she had him in the most amazing position ever. He kept shaking his head and smiling. At the end of it all he said “you’re not gonna have to worry about waiting for that raise it’s going to affect in 30 days. You’ve exceeded my expectations. Welcome as the director of marketing and sales for our company starting next month.”
And that’s very same day I got the most incredible email from her, thanking me profusely for helping her change. But the real work was done by her. She surrendered to the process. She did everything I asked her to do. And the end result? She not only saved her job, she walked through her own fears and insecurities, and in the process got an incredible raise and a new title with the company she had always loved working for.”
As David has shared over the 37 years of his work in the world of personal growth, and 27 years as a counselor and a coach, that we can overcome so many of our own insecurities on a more regular basis if we reach out for help, and invest more time, money, and effort into ourselves. See more info on David’s Art of Presenting and Public Speaking Course here… http://davidessel.com/learn-the-art-of-presenting-and-public-speaking/
If you need help, reach out to David today at www.davidessel.com