Fear of Change?
Are you afraid, to change?
Most of us are extremely afraid to change our lives!… But here’s a story that will warm your heart.
Change is hard.
Stopping drinking is hard, stopping overeating is hard, stopping smoking is hard, stopping drug addiction is hard, stopping emotional spending is hard… Change is damn hard!
And the longer we have the challenges of anxiety or depression or insomnia… The longer we have the challenges the more difficult it is for most of us to change.
Now there are really good reasons for that, the patterns get stuck in the subconscious mind, the subconscious protects it as something “important” because we’ve been drinking or smoking, or overeating for so long… Or we’ve been dealing with anxiety or depression for so long that the subconscious actually thinks this is just a normal part of our existence!
So when we try to change, the subconscious fights back, via excuses, justifications, rationalizations, and even denial!
And through the justification, rationalizations, and denial, we end up getting stuck in staying where we are possibly for our entire existence.
For the past 42 years, as a counselor, minister, number one best-selling author, I have helped millions of people understand how to change the subconscious mind so we can drop old habits, move away from the fear of change and accept change as a natural part of our human evolution.
I have written books, like our number one bestseller “focus! Slay your goals!“, Which was selected by bookauthority.org as one of the top 100 goal setting books ever written, and they even placed me right next to Dale Carnegie, one of the most important and beautiful gifts that we’ve received in the world of literature.
And in the book, we gave tons of stories of people who have changed their lives by changing their actions.
I am going to share with you today, a list of changes one young woman has made in our several months of working together, that has even shocked and surprised her, because she’s carried so much anxiety and so much insecurity and so many fears for a large portion of her life.
But wait! There’s more!
She is slowly letting go of these fears and the self-sabotaging behavior and I can tell you because we speak every week, her independence, her confidence, and her self-esteem are going through the roof.
You can hear it in the energy of her voice. You can read it in her homework assignments!
She made a decision to change, and change is here!
Let me just create a partial list of what she sent me when I asked her to write about all the changes she’s made since we started working together:
Number One. She journals what we call the “4 x 4 journal technique“, as a tool to help with emotions seven days a week.
Number Two. She’s worked through the pain of losing a home she loved in a different state.
Number Three. Anxiety and codependency, she has acknowledged how both have held her back in life.
Number Four. She overcame a struggle when she decided to step away full time from a family business, yet it’s one of the most powerful moves she’s made.
Number Five. She is working through family challenges and has come up with solutions to not get pulled back into the family drama.
Number Six. She is dropping the self-criticism, or her “should“ in life.
Number Seven. She has found out that her feelings are extremely “valid“.
She also discovered that her perfectionism was a form of codependency and perfectionism is an addiction!
Number Eight. She has learned how so many people surrounding her have used passive-aggressive behavior to create separation, and now she can spot it and deal with it.
Number Nine. Becoming more independent and less codependent.
Number Ten. Setting boundaries with family and friends and coworkers.
Number Eleven. Regaining her personal peace which has been elusive for a number of years.
Number Twelve. Trusting her intuition, learning to listen to it.
Number Thirteen. She has a mission to become “messier in life“ because for years everything had to be perfect!
She is seeing the link between perfectionism and anxiety
Number Fourteen. She is recognizing her anxiety triggers and has a ton of tools in order to deal with everyone.
I could go on I think she wrote me 48 changes she’s made since we started working together… 48 changes!
She is an absolute rock star as a client, she has never backed away from any exercises I’ve asked her to do, she has delved into the pitfalls of life that surrounded anxiety and codependency, and perfectionism.
She is a warrior. She is a lover. She has an amazing relationship with her husband. And she’s becoming healthier, happier, and more independent every day.
As I spoke with her in the morning here’s what I said: “your energy lifts my energy through the roof!“
And it’s so true!
I can’t wait to get on the phone with her every week and to tap into her beautiful energy which has changed so dramatically since we started working together months ago.
It’s easy as a counselor to see my client’s potential to change, but it’s not always easy for clients to see the same potential that I see.
But now, she has seen the incredible human being, the amazing woman she really is, and every change she makes brings her closer to her true self.
I don’t care how long you’ve struggled with anxiety, perfectionism, addiction, low self-confidence, low self-esteem, resentment, rage, anger… …… It doesn’t matter how long you’ve struggled, I can help to shift that struggle to one of joy, happiness, and self-control.
Emotional regulation is the key to all of our joy.
If you need help with any challenge in life work with me one on one from anywhere in the world that http://www.talkdavid.com
David Essel‘s work is highly endorsed by individuals like the late Wayne Dyer, and celebrity Jenny McCarthy says “David Essel is the new leader of the positive thinking movement.“
His work as a counselor and minister has been verified by so many different organizations like Psychology Today, Theravive, Therapy Tribe, and, marriage.com which has called David one of the top relationship counselors and experts in the world.
To work with him one on one from anywhere in the world simply visit www.davidessel.com
