Why Is Sobriety So Hard?

So why is getting sober and staying sober so hard for millions of Americans every year?

Depending on the statistics you look at or the studies that have been compiled, approximately 30% of Americans struggle with alcohol regularly.

They may have been former social drinkers who have tended to increase the amount they drink on a daily, weekly, or monthly basis.

Or maybe they’re retired, bored, and turned to alcohol as a way to try to deal with boredom or loneliness. 

For the past 30 years, number one best-selling author, counselor, minister, and master Life Coach David Essel has been helping millions of people to finally get sober for life, for good!

Below, David talks about the reasons why so many people struggle to get and stay sober for life.

“I was one of the statistics. For over 25 years I was a raging alcoholic and cocaine addict, even holding professional positions as I do today as a counselor, master life coach, author, and minister.

I never allowed my alcohol to seep into my daily work, but at 8:01 PM I would begin to drink.

And I never thought that I would ever get sober. It was too hard. And anyway, would it really be worth it?

And I know millions of Americans feel the same way. Why should I get sober? I haven’t gotten a DUI. I haven’t been fired from work. I haven’t lost my marriage, yet. So why would I get sober?

And to make it even more saddening, the average success rate of the addiction recovery programs in the United States is about 10%, which means most of our programs have a 90% failure rate.

And why is that?

Well, it’s pretty simple. Many of the programs like alcoholics anonymous are working off of philosophies that were created 80 years ago but never updated!

Even with all that we know about the power of the mind, the subconscious mind, brain chemistry supplementation, lifestyle changes, and more, this organization like many others that were formed years ago have never taken the time to update what they share with their members, and what we knew 80 years ago was totally different than what we know today.

 Another reason why it’s hard to get and stay sober is because of the power of the subconscious mind.

In our number one best-selling book, “Focus! Slay Your Goals“, we talk about how the subconscious mind, once we feed it a pattern of let’s say drinking on a regular basis, or binge drinking even once a month, the subconscious mind is so powerful that it will use anything like rationalization, justification or denial to keep the habit of drinking going.

 In the book we share a story about Tom, an opiate addict and alcoholic for 30 years who had tried every recovery program known to man, he had been into multiple treatment centers, with the same and result: relapse.

In our holistic addiction recovery program, he became one of our shining stars!

He shares in the book that he feels that one of the most important things that we do differently than all other recovery programs in the USA, is brain chemistry supplementation.

I was introduced to amino acid therapy for brain chemistry in 1990, by a former pharmacist name Stan Meyerson who thoroughly believed that all addictions could be eradicated if we made major lifestyle choices and utilized brain chemistry supplementation like amino acid therapy.

The client mentioned above has been clean now for a couple of years. Myself? Clean for many, many years.

Is it easy? Not necessarily.

For some people, it might be easier because they have surrounded themselves with exceptional teachers, counselors, and coaches and they have the support needed to stay sober.

But I can tell you from my own experience, and that of the thousands of people that we have helped get sober one on one over the past 30+ years, that it’s possible.

I don’t care how long you’ve been an alcoholic or addict if you get in the right program, and do the work necessary, anyone, and I mean anyone can heal.

 But we are up against some pretty difficult odds, and some of those odds come from the very programs that are supposed to help people get sober.

One of my clients came in the other day after attending a meeting for sobriety, and told me that they were very confused because during the meeting several people were saying “everyone in this room is an alcoholic today, and you’ll be an alcoholic until the day you die.“

That to me is insanity. Who the hell wants to hear that and get excited about recovery?

I remember when I was in the rooms years ago and I heard that kind of statement I wanted to vomit. 

I teach my clients how to attend these types of meetings without buying into the nonsense. You’re not an alcoholic for life, no one is an alcoholic for life.

I’m writing this article as proof that I used to be an alcoholic but now I am David Essel, totally free, totally sober, and I don’t even like to use labels on myself or others who have beaten any addiction in the world.

So who am I really? Am I David Essel a recovering alcoholic? Hell no! I’m simply David Essel.

No labels are necessary. I don’t even think it’s healthy to brag about how many years people are sober, because the years someone is sober has nothing to do with if they’re happy, if they are a decent person, or if they’re just a jerk who doesn’t drink anymore.

I’ve worked with many people that have not drunk or done drugs for 10, 15, or 20 years who are complete self-centered idiots. And I say that with love.

They just never got the memo that not using alcohol or drugs isn’t enough, we need to go into the deep emotional work to be able to learn how to deal with life, and all of life‘s ups and downs without needing food, alcohol, or drugs as a crutch to lean on.

 As you read this right now, maybe you’re in a position of struggling with a substance or behavior that is holding you back in life.

Let’s take a look at just a few simple steps to follow:

Number One. Anyone, anyone, anyone can get sober regardless of how deep the addiction is.

Number Two. I recommend that you find a program that has been updated. Not one that is based on principles from 80 years ago, and surrender to this new program.

Number Three. Work with an addiction specialist at least once a week if you’re attending meetings, or maybe twice a week if you’re not attending any type of meetings whatsoever.

Number Four. Brain chemistry supplementation is a must! Contact me, or anyone else in the world of addiction recovery who is familiar with amino acid therapy and give yourself a leg up on recovery. It makes a huge difference.

Number Five. Commit to getting sober for life. Not one day at a time, but make the damn commitment to getting sober for life. Most of us have years upon years upon years proving we don’t know how, or can’t socially drink, we’ve proven that we don’t know how to handle happiness without drinking, sadness without drinking, anger without drinking, boredom without drinking… It’s time to learn all of the different options that we can do to learn to deal with our emotions without substances or behaviors that we become addicted to.

I’m a firm believer that if we let go of the old programs and create new programs based on all of the information that we have in 2019, we can make a radical dent in the number of people struggling with alcohol, drugs, and food and at the same time, we can potentially start to help to save thousands of families that are being drowned by one parent or the other struggling with addiction.

Let’s all wake up. Let’s get sober. The benefits are so worth it.

Is there an effort? Hell yes, and worth every second that you put into self-love, another name for sobriety.“

 David Essel‘s work is highly endorsed by individuals like the late Wayne Dyer, and celebrity Jenny Mccarthy says “David Essel is the new leader of the positive thinking movement.“



His work as a counselor and master Life Coach has been verified by organizations like psychology today, and Marriage.com has verified David as one of the top relationship counselors and experts in the world.

 For more information on all that David does, please visit www.davidessel.com