Intimacy?
Is intimacy in your relationship not at the level you would like?
About 80% of clients that I’ve worked with in the past complain that they’re not getting enough intimacy, physical touch from their partners.
Many of them, complained about the fact that they used to have incredible sex lives, all kinds of public displays of affection for the first year or so of the relationship but now it’s disappeared.
What do we do?
For 40 years now I’ve been in the world of personal growth as a counselor, number one best-selling author, minister, and master life coach.
I’m going to share a thought below that might seem a little different, but it has worked for so many of my clients over all these years!
And it’s a topic a lot of couples have a hard time talking about, even saying the word, can make some people feel uncomfortable.
But there are so many couples, I can think of one right now that I worked with in Australia, that have been married for 20 years but for the past 10 years had not had sex at all and they were both considering divorce.
So what did I recommend?
Here we go, buckle your seatbelt‘s because this stuff really works!
Number One. Encourage them both to take a shower and pick one night a week that they’re going to try to rekindle the flame. I only do that after I make sure there are no long-term held resentments by either party against the other, resentments will destroy all kinds of chances to rekindle a relationship.
As a sidenote… I worked with this couple for three months to get rid of all of their resentments before I brought them into this exercise we are describing today.
Number Two. So let’s say they pick Saturday night at 8 o’clock, so they both take their showers, they decide if they want to put on lingerie or pajamas or if they just want to do what I recommend… Just slowly slip into bed naked.
Number Three. We begin with simple kissing. With so many couples they’ve forgotten the art of kissing and the powerful release that happens with endorphins when we get involved with deep French kissing… Which is an amazing way to connect with your partner.
Number Four. While they are kissing I ask them to caress each other‘s bodies… To run their hands from their hair all the way down their back to their butt to their legs just keep gently touching each other‘s bodies… The skin is the largest sex organ on the body. It is so incredibly sensitive for most of us that it’s a beautiful way to slowly walk back into an intimate life together.
Number Five. After kissing and touching for 5 to 10 minutes and then ask them to start playing with each other‘s genitals… It’s called mutual masturbation.
So as you slowly arouse each other with the kiss and the touch we start to play in this area… Gently rubbing a finger around your partner’s most intimate parts, getting them excited, getting the man hard and the woman dripping wet.
And then I ask them to go ahead and masturbate each other, to gently touch and tease until their partner reaches orgasm, and then they reach their own orgasm.
With some couples I have them doing this at the same time, with others they take turns and one person lays on their back while the other massages their genitals and brings them to orgasm.
I have found, over the last 30+ years, that this one exercise repeated only one day a week will start to rekindle that deep flame within.
As many of my couples say after three weeks of doing that they’re already making full-blown love again something that they hadn’t done in years!
You can also find more erotic intimate ideas in our new top-selling book “50+ flavors of erotic love… Leaving the vanilla world for ecstasy!“
If you want to work with David 1 on 1 to improve your intimacy and communication skills, join his course here https://davidessel.com/love-intimacy-communication-deep-sexual-connection/
Drop the shame, drop the guilt, follow the directions above with an open heart and an open mind in order to rekindle the deep flame in your love relationship.“
David Essel‘s work is highly endorsed by individuals like the late Wayne Dyer, and celebrity Jenny McCarthy says “David Essel is the new leader of the positive thinking movement.“
His work as a counselor and minister has been verified by organizations like psychology today, and marriage.com, which has verified David is one of the top counselors and relationship experts in the world.
To work with David one on one in his love and intimacy course from anywhere in the world via phone or Skype, please visit www.davidessel.com
