New relationships?

New Relationships? How to find the best partner for you in life?

Here are the most important tips you need to know.

Are you looking for love?

Do you really believe you’re ready for that next, incredible love connection?

Now here comes a tough question: Are you prepared? Ready? Do you know what it takes to be ready for the deepest of love?

For the past 30 years, number one best-selling author, counselor, minister, and master life coach David Essel has been helping people from all over the world prepare themselves for the real thing: deep, monogamous, lasting love.

Below, David offers some of the most important tips you’ll ever find in regards to being prepared for the love of your life.

“So many people today say they’re ready for love, they’re looking for love… But they’re not ready at all!

Does that surprise you?

With 80% of relationships in our country absolutely dysfunctional, it’s easy to see that most of us are not ready at all for that incredible long-term commitment that we think… We want.

Here are a few critical pointers to take deep into your conscious and subconscious mind as you prepare for your next relationship:

Number One. Are you happy single? Are you happy alone? If you’re not… read no further.

This is one of the most important keys that people forget about, you should only be looking for a relationship when you are really at peace with having no one by your side.

Now even though this is an incredibly important fact, most people when they come to me as their counselor, helping them prepare for a relationship, and I ask them why they’re looking for a new love they’ll make statements like:

“I’m tired of being alone… I’m tired of doing everything on my own… I’m tired of raising these kids by myself… I’m tired of going to parties by myself… I’m tired of having to try to pay for everything on my own… All my friends are in great relationships, I deserve to be in a great relationship too.“

Now if you look at the above we are looking at people who are unhappy, incredibly needy, and this is not the time to begin looking for a solid life partner if you feel connected to any of the above victim-like statements.

Take your time, become happy, before you even think about bringing someone else into your life, when you’re not at peace with where you are and who you are.

Number Two. Have you released all resentments, every resentment possible against former lovers?

I don’t care how much they betrayed you. How badly they hurt you emotionally or unfortunately even physically. If we don’t go into full forgiveness and release partners from the past we’re going to bring our jaded attitude, or lack of trust, into the next relationship.

In other words, your next partner is going to pay for the pain you have not released from your previous lovers.

Number Three. Have you written down your deal killers in love, those red flags that maybe were blowing in the wind in your past relationships?

Do you know what they are for you? Do you have them listed?

In our top-selling book, “Love and relationship secrets that everyone needs to know!“, We go into great detail with something I created 25 years ago called “the 3% rule of dating.“

What this rule says is, that you can have 97% compatibility with a partner, but if they have any of your deal-killers, any of the red flags of love that you’ve experienced before… The odds of the relationship working out are incredibly tiny.

Deal killers could be anything from a potential partner with small children, to someone who smokes or drinks, someone who is an emotional spender, an emotional eater… Someone who has a passive-aggressive nature… Someone who never listens to your point of view… For some people a deal-killer can be someone from a different religion, oh my Lord there are so many potential deal killers but if you don’t know what they are for you? You’re going to walk back into the same trap.

I would like to stop right here. The above is all you need to focus on to prepare yourself for a great love affair.

Find a way to become happy, right now.

Work with a professional to forgive all of your past lovers regardless of how poorly they may have treated you.

And then finally, know your red flags, know your deal-killers, and if a dating partner happens to have any of your deal killers and they refuse to let them go, then it’s time for you to exit that potential relationship and open yourself up for something very real.

Don’t follow the crowd, just because your friends and family are saying that “you’re the greatest catch in the world and how come you’re not dating”, don’t use that as peer pressure to go out and start dating.

Wait, wait, wait until you’re ready… Your patience will pay off big time.“

David Essel‘s work is highly endorsed by individuals like the late Wayne Dyer, and celebrity Jenny McCarthy says “David Essel is the new leader of the positive thinking movement.“

His work as a counselor and minister has been verified by organizations such as psychology today, and marriage.com has verified David as one of the top counselors and relationship experts in the world.

To prepare yourself for love, work with David one on one from anywhere in the world via phone or Skype at www.DavidEssel.com

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GRIEF..BE CAREFUL! SELF TALK? A M ANXIETY?

By David Essel • December 30, 2025

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Message of Hope

By David Essel • December 30, 2025

I sit here today, like many people, looking back at the last five years and understanding the struggle that most of us have been going through. Like me, you might be experiencing a holiday season without a loved one Like me you might be experiencing a holiday season that has been preceded by several years of deep trauma, that for many of us is a part of our lives… Even though we wish it wasn’t. In the struggles we’ve all faced, I think it’s so important to figure out what we’re learning about ourselves, what we’re learning about our belief systems, what we’re learning about self-care and how we treat others. Normally people do these posts on January 1 getting everyone ready for the new year, but I wanted to do it today because 2026 is in our hands, it can be complete crap, or it can be something quite different. It really depends on our perspective, our mindset, and how we’re willing to change what isn’t working now into what will work in the near future. Some of us have had incredible health struggles. Others have had relationship break ups. Others have gone through Divorce. Others have gone through financial collapse. Others have tried to figure out the whole world of grieving, after losing a loved one when they’ve never been in that position before. Others have struggled with finding the right job, the right career Others have struggled with deep mental health issues, anxiety, depression, mental issues. So we come to this point, and we can either hold onto the struggles that we’ve gone through over the last five years or we can slowly start to release them and look for tools that are all over the place and how to change our mindset how to change our subconscious mind and how to expect the best after five years of hell for many of us. Is it possible? Hell, yes! But we have to decide now… How we’re going to strengthen our mental health, how we’re going to improve our physical health, how we’re going to improve our relationships, how we’re going to improve our financial situation, how we’re going to improve anything else not mentioned here that has been a stressful experience for us in the past. Many of us will find solace in a deep connection by going deeper into your spiritual or religious experiences. Others will find solace by finding a mentor, counselor, teacher who can assist us because they’ve already been in the situation we’re currently facing. Others will find solace “community“, whether it’s business groups or Recovery, groups, or mastermind groups, community could be the answer for many people who are struggling right now. Others will find solace simply by letting go! By releasing the constant grind… By releasing the Constant need to “have more buy more“ Others will find solace by going deeper into the world of volunteerism, whether it’s pet shelters or reading to the blind, there’s so many different ways that you can start to shift your identity from struggle to service. Others will find solace by going into the creative world, by learning a musical instrument or learning how to draw or paint or woodwork or some other type of hobby that allows them to tap into different parts of the brain to continue to grow as a human being, not to get stuck in the negativity. I have clients that have found great solace in the last six months by completely getting off of all social media. I have clients in the last six months that found solace by completely eliminating anything to do with the news or political conversations. I have clients in the last year that never believe they’d be able to meditate or learn diaphragmatic breathing or learn emotional regulation or lose 50 to 100 pounds and yet they’ve all done it in the last 12 months! But it didn’t happen because they started 30 days ago it’s happened because they started 12 months ago which is the whole purpose of my article here! Now is the time my brothers and sisters to begin the change! Now is the time to start to really learn about the power of your subconscious mind and how to turn it into one of the greatest assets you’ve ever had in your life and I promise you this… If you learn how to master The subconscious mind in 12 months, you’ll be a completely different person potentially in every area of your life! I’ve seen that happen in my life! I’ve seen it happen in thousands of thousands of clients that I’ve worked with over the past 50 years… Their lives completely changed in a year or less! This is why I am Asking you to strongly consider taking the time now up until January 1 to really get yourself going so on January 2 you know what you’re gonna be doing every day in order to shatter the old triggers, to shatter the old fears and insecurities, and to bring you to the place that you want to be financially, relationship, wise, healthwise, mentally, emotionally… I want you in 12 months or less to be exactly where you want to be and I know you can do it because I’ve seen it happen over 1000 times! You have the power to radically change your life right now if you so desire! You have the power to completely turn around anything that has been a trigger, and turn it into a non-event! Believe in yourself! Believe even deeper in yourself! I am wishing you the most amazing radical change if that is what’s necessary in your life, so you can live the life of your desires, your dreams and create at the same time opportunities for others to see what’s possible… You become the role model for success! I’m sending you so much love, so much joy, and a prayer that you take 2026 seriously enough to begin in writing the daily rituals that you will start to follow in order to create what you deserve. With love, David